Man's Best Friend?

Currently Reading: The Maltese Falcon by Dashiell Hammett

This is my dog. This is my dog with the package that arrived for me for my birthday from friends down in San Antonio. Any questions? :-)

Fortunately, she was so preoccupied with the tape that she never managed to chew through the box itself so nothing inside was damaged.

Dance CC Dance

Self-explanatory

People Keep Asking . . .

Currently Reading: The Maltese Falcon by Dashiell Hammett

I keep getting the weirdest questions. Most of them are just plain unanswerable but some are pretty stupid. Right now there are three that I keep hearing over and over. Don't really have an answer to them either, or at least not one that makes any more sense than the question.

Question 1: So, how does it feel to be
married?
Question 2: So, when are you having
children?
Question 3: So, how does it feel to be
turning 35?

Question 1: Married

How does it feel to be married? About the same as it did before actually. How does one answer something like that. You might as well aske me "How does it feel to be breathing?" It's not something you can even really put into words is it? Oh there are little things you can mention that describe the state of marriage of course. You can go into the part about not being lonely anymore. You can get into the practicalities of sharing a bathroom or closet, but how does it FEEL? The only thing that comes to mind when someone asks me this question is a line from the musical Company. It goes, "You'll always be what you always were, which has nothing to do with -- all to do with her." Unfortunately this sort of approach REALLY confuses anyone who never has been in a good marriage or those who haven't been all that happy in their marriage for a long time.

Question 2. Children

When am I having children? Well this is one of those cases where I can put in a little humor and sometimes deflect the question. I'm NEVER having children. You see, it's biologically impossible for me to have children. I simply do NOT have the organs necessary to give birth. When is my WIFE having children? Well that's different matter entirely. I have NO idea when she's having children at the current time. I DO know that it has to be at least 9 months from now. That's basic biology right? So, anytime between nine months from now and the day she starts menopause. Of course, given the advances in science today, maybe we can push that date back even further. Maybe the more accurate answer is between nine months from now and death :-)

Question 3. Turning 35

Do we all get this question? In some form or another I think we do. We get it at 20, that's for sure. And I remember getting it at 30 as well. Only time a birthday actually FELT like anything was when I turned 21. I could legally buy beer that day. The rest? Well hell it doesn't really FEEL like anything. Ok, on some forms I have to press a different check box when it asks my age range. But I'm not so old that I get any benefits out of it. There isn't a discount for people 35 and older. There's no AARP for Generation Y folks like me. Or are we Generation X? I think I'm still in Gen X. Does anyone care? No. Wait, not caring about things like this, that's a trademark of Gen X right? Or maybe I'm just getting so old my mind is going.

What I can say for sure about turning 35 is that I don't have any more gray hair on my head than I did in school. I can say that and even better, it's actually TRUE :-) Oh I'm sure there's a little LESS hair up there but I'm not balding as fast as many of my fellow high school grads. My brother in law, at this point, he was already nearly bald AND salt and pepper gray.

How did I get on the hair thing anyway? I guess your mind wanders more when you hit mid-30. Maybe that's why I have no answer to the "how does it feel" question. It doesn't feel because I'm too old to remember :-)

Licensed to Drive . . . but not to bank

Currently Reading: Black Dahlia Avenger by Steve Hodel

I have come across quite a few frustratingly stupid company policies in my day but I don't think anything tops what I came across today while trying to get CC a bank account at First Tennessee. It all started on Saturday when we paid them our first visit. They were quite happy to see us, very nice, very friendly, then we started filling out the paperwork. CC's got her work authorization card, no problem. She's got her social security card, no problem. Tennessee driver's license? Well no, she doesn't have one of those yet. No? Then no account for her. Ok, I'll just add her to mine. I have a license. And account there? Yes. But still no license for her? Obviously not. No adding her to my account either.

So, this morning, she and I went down to the Tennessee Department of Transportation office to get her a new driver's license and to renew mine. No problem for me of course. Just pay the fee and you're all done. For her, things were a LITTLE more complicated.

Starting in 2004, you cannot get a driver's license in Tennessee unless you're a citizen or resident alien. What you CAN get, if you're here on a student visa or something like that, is a permit to drive. You take the same tests, you get a card with your picture on it, it's just not an official license.

In order to GET this thing, after waiting in line a bit, CC had to show her birth certificate, her work authorization card, her passport, our marriage license, her social security card and a bill showing that we actually live in a house somewhere. If she was born here, of course, all she'd need is a birth certificate an social security card so the burden of proof is MUCH higher for her. But here's the real kicker. This card, despite all the documentation you have to provide to show who you are, cannot be used as a valid ID card.

So what does that mean? We found out when we stopped back at the bank early this afternoon. We show the new accounts woman CC's new driving permit thinking, well certainly this should be proof enough, only to learn that no, it must be a 100% offical Tennessee license, no exceptions, period. The foreigner permit just isn't good enough.

The woman sounded appologetic about the whole thing and said, "Oh, we want your business. This is just company policy." Me, I'm thinking, "Obviously they don't want our business THAT badly." And I'm also thinking that since my wife's money isn't GOOD enough for them, you know, maybe THEY'RE not good enough for MY money. So I'll be shopping around for a new financial institution, one that's a LITTLE less paranoid.

Hybernating

Currently Reading: Black Dahlia Avenger by Steve Hodel

Hybernating. That's my story, I'm sticking with it.

What really happened was only vaguely more exciting. CC had a schedule change and when CC has a schedule change, I have a schedule change.

Last week, CC wasn't getting much sleep. They were getting all the training materials together for their new client so she was up all night or she'd sleep early then wake up at 3 am and start working on things. I don' t know if you've ever had to go through something like that but it's damn hard to sleep soundly in a room where someone else is working like that, even if you're near-deaf like me.

So we spent a good part of the weekend unwinding from that stressed out week and catching up on our sleep. Hybernating :-)

Didn't last long though. Monday morning, I'm not making this up, I was awake at 5:30 . . . AM! Yes, that's right, me, awake and mobile at 5:30 in the morning. CC needed to be at her boss' house between 6 and 6:30 so they could go over material for managment training.

Today wasn't nearly as bad. I got to sleep in. Didn't wake up until 6:30! WOO HOO! Yes, you know there's something seriously wrong with the universe when sleeping until 6:30 sounds good :-)

Some of you out there are no doubt wondering why I don't let CC drive herselve to work instead of having to wake up early. Simple answer to that question. She doesn't have a valid license. Her Manila license expired.

Speaking of licenses, we're getting one for her tomorrow. It doesn't have anything to do with these early mornings though. We were out Saturday trying to get her a bank account but they require a driver's license now. Can you believe it? We went through all the trouble of getting a social security card and that's not enough. Have to have a driver's license too.

In fact, that's the policy with all the local banks here. Not sure if they're as picky about it over at Bank of America but since we don't have a Chase branch here or a Citibank branch, we have to deal with what's in the area. SO, tomorrow we're going to get her a driver's license . . . I hope :-) Then Saturday she'll have her own bank accounts and everything will be peaceful again :-) . . . I hope :-)